SHOPPING DISORDERS AND THE MALL SPIRIT - Segment 3
I’ve been chasing the perfect gift for a good part of my marriage. It’s always in the back of my mind. But it’s so far back, it’s difficult to reach. My memory doesn’t like the long trek, so it
rarely goes there. I think it’s afraid
of the dark. With such an undependable
memory, I often have to resort to the advice my wife gave me shortly after we
were married. Realizing I was afflicted
with S.A.D. (Shopping Anxiety Disorder), she consoled me by saying, “It’s
the thought that counts.”
So the following Christmas, I
gave her some of my thoughts. She gave
me a piece of her mind. Apparently, the
thoughts that I gave her didn’t count.
“No,” she said, “When I say “It’s the thought that counts,” I mean you
don’t have to look for a big, expensive gift, just something small and
inexpensive. Well, not too inexpensive, just
something that shows you’re thinking about me.
The next Christmas, I looked
for the perfect gift that would fit in the “thoughts
that count” category. After days of
frantically rummaging through purses, diamond rings, high-fashioned accessories,
and some nice thoughts in several major department stores, I found a nice refrigerator
magnet. I was hoping my “thought” would count. It did.
It was our first refrigerator magnet as a married couple. We stood, hand-in-hand, admiring it on the
refrigerator.
For her birthday, I got Connie
a large bouquet of flowers. “These are
beautiful.” she said. “Where did you
find them?”
“In the neighbor’s yard,” I
answered. “’Thoughts that count’ require
much more creativity.”
One Christmas I was sitting in my recliner,
staring out the window, shopping for some new thoughts, when I was interrupted
by an article in a popular magazine that said it might not be the thought that
counts. I was immediately thrown into a
state of confusion, a state where I had once sought residence. Do my thoughts count? Or don’t they count.
What if I kept my thoughts to myself?
Would they count? Who would even
know?
To be continued...check back soon
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