CHRISTMAS DECOR SHOWDOWN - Segment 2 (Scroll down for opening segment)


      Next to hanging shirts from doorknobs, I enjoy watching the neighbors decorate for Christmas.

     On occasion I will even lend a helping hand…“Hang on to that eave, Norm, and I’ll get a ladder so you’ll have something to stand on.”

     “Why can’t you hang lights from the eaves, like Norm?” asked Connie.

     “I could, but Norm’s using my ladder.  Besides, the lights refuse to leave their warm box.”     

     “I’m sure they would be more cooperative if you would quit screaming and put down that rifle.  And, no, they don’t want to ride with you to the shooting range.”      

     Wanting to please my wife and have some dinner, I agreed to string the lights.  “Here, hold the gun,” I said, “while I try to get them out of the box.  And don’t be afraid to pull that trigger if they start making threatening gestures.   

     I removed the lights from the box without incident.  Then I walked over to Norm’s.  “Sorry, Norm, but I need my ladder.”  I tried to ignore his screams as I carried the ladder around the house.

     During the brief cease-fire, I quickly fastened the lights to the eaves along the house.  They refused to shine.

     “Why don’t you try this new device?” asked my wife.  It’s called a ‘Light String Saver.’  You can test the lights to see if they are working.”

     “I just plugged in the lights.  I don’t need a ‘Light String Saver’ to tell me its dark out here.” 

     “But one bulb may be the reason they’re not shining,” Connie continued.

     “If that’s the case, hand me the hammer and I’ll fix the problem.”

     In theory, one bulb is the culprit in keeping 67 other bulbs from shining brightly.  This is just theory.  In reality, none of the 67 bulbs work, and they’re not planning on working, but taking each one out and testing it gives you something to occupy your time while you’re waiting for the return of summer.

 

 

To be continued...check back soon