CALORIE WARS - Segment 3 (Scroll down for earlier segments)

     
      I grabbed the rope at both ends, put it behind me, then brought it over my head and jumped.  As I was in mid-air, I looked down; there was my stomach.  It hadn’t left.  In the next instant, my body snapped back like a rubber band, colliding with my stomach with such force that it sent me sprawling.  “Are you okay?” asked Ralph, running over to help me pick up all my calories that had spilled on the pavement.

     “I think I’ll be okay if you can just carry me into the house, and let me rest in your recliner.  Yeah, that’s good.  Say, could you turn on the baseball game, and bring me a slice of pizza?  I’m feeling much better now.”

     With the arrival of winter, I thought I had escaped any thoughts of exercise.  Then my wife turned on me.  You’re looking a little pale,” she said one day.  “I don’t think you’re getting enough exercise. 

      “Are you collaborating with Ralph?” I asked. 

     “No, not at all,” she answered.  “I just thought you would feel better with a little exercise.”

      “Well, I’m not jumping rope.”

      “You don’t have to jump rope.  Why don’t you try cross-country skiing?”

      “Okay, okay, maybe.  Let me think about it, and I’ll let you know in July.” 

      “You know there won’t be any snow then.”

      “I know.  I thought that would be the best time.”

      “I still think you would feel better with some exercise.”

      I finally decided to try cross-country skiing.  Almost immediately...


To be continued...check back soon