Ernie had been comfortably snuggled down inside his sleeping bag. Unknowingly, Ernie had also snuggled his sleeping bag up against one of the ant pyramids. Not being familiar with sleeping bags, the ants decided to do some exploring. Marching across the bag, they discovered an opening and made their way inside. This is when Ernie decided a quick exit was in order. He was now filling the still, night air with shrieks and flailing arms, not to mention great dance steps.
To get a better look at the situation, I lit the lantern, which Ernie immediately kicked over while dancing under the stars, trying to shake off ants. The lantern landed on the ant hill and fell apart, causing the ant hill to burst into flames.
Meanwhile, Ernie had disappeared into the night. Looking up, I could see the faint image of a distant figure, slapping himself and moving hurriedly along the outside of the vacant lot. It was Ernie. After a couple of nice laps around the lot, Ernie made a quick pit stop in camp. From what I could see, the ants seemed to be enjoying the ride.
“Get these ants off me!” he yelled.
“Not so loud,” I countered. “You’ll wake up the neighbors. Besides, you need to put out this fire.”
Looking at the high, tinder-dry grass surrounding the ant hill, and extending as far as the eye could see, which was not far because of all the smoke, I considered my options if the fire got out of control. I could say it was a control burn that included a couple of homes, but that wouldn’t appease the headhunters. Since it would be my head they were hunting, I knew my only other option would be a change of address. That would be good. I was certain all the neighbors would give me a going-away party, as long as I was going away for a long time.
Just then, another idea flashed across my mind, almost blinding me. “Hey, Ernie, “I said. “I’m thinking of applying for asylum in Slovakia. You wanna tag along?”
Ernie didn’t hear me. He was too busy stomping up and down on the ant hill, trying to put out the fire. Being the emotionally unbalanced insects that they are, this further agitated the ants. Having to leave quickly, without their belongings, the ants decided to take the ‘‘Inside Passage”, the inside of Ernie’s pant legs.
This is when the clothes started flying...
To be continued...check back soon
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